Unwanted Heat

The coffee pot is right next to the stove where I’m making our breakfast. Nicholas is right next to me as he prepares his coffee. I can feel myself blushing immediately, remembering how it felt to have his body pressed against mine last night and his body wrapped around me this morning when I woke up. When he returns to the breakfast bar the air around me suddenly feels cooler and I find myself wishing he hadn’t left the spot where he was standing.

“If you don’t like it-”

“Kenzie, you haven’t made anything that I haven’t liked, so I have no doubt this will taste just as good.”

“Your mom said she would stop by later this afternoon to check on you but that if you keep breakfast down and your fever doesn’t return, you won’t need me here any longer.”

“Oh… that’s good. I’m sure you have things to do.”

We sit in silence finishing our breakfast; both of us seem to be avoiding the topic of last night. I don’t know what to say to him. Do I apologize for having the nightmare? Do I thank him for waking me? For holding me all night? For comforting me? For kissing me? How the hell does someone handle this?!?! I don’t know that there is a protocol for how you deal with someone the morning after they wake you up and hold you all night following a nightmare. I suppose this would be different if we were friends or lovers; at least then we would be emotionally invested in our relationship. This is different because we’re not emotionally invested in this business transaction… at least Nicholas isn’t. I think I could be…

“Do you return to work tomorrow or are you off?” Once again Nicholas pulls me from my thoughts.

“I’m scheduled to work in the morning. What about you? Are you going to PFS tomorrow?”

“Probably not, I think I’ll work from home tomorrow. My office is set up so that I can work from here so my assistant will only need to rearrange any face-to-face meetings I had scheduled for tomorrow. I think I’ll spend one more day here before braving the office. I don’t need my employees concerned that I’m sick. It’s the reason I didn’t want to go to the hospital. It’s not unusual for me to periodically work from home so it won’t raise any red flags for anyone if I spend the day here tomorrow.”

“It’s good that you have that flexibility.”

“It is. I usually work a lot of evenings and weekends from here so having a fully equipped office is essential.”

“Do you ever not work?” I can’t help but laugh. It seems he works constantly: long hours at the office only to return home to work more hours.

No wonder he said he doesn’t have time to date… it really doesn’t.

“Not really. Even when I’ve taken a vacation I don’t completely disconnect from the office. I can’t… when you run your own business like I do, a day completely off means a risk that something could happen. I’ve taken a day here and there, of course, but even then I’ve never been completely unavailable to my staff. Alex always knows how to reach me if something comes up.”

“What do you like to do when you are able to take a day or two off?”

“I love spending time on the open water. I have a boat that I don’t get to use nearly as much as I should. There’s something so calming about being on the water, don’t you think?”

“I wouldn’t know. I’ve never been on a boat before.”

“Never?” I shake my head. “Wow… you have no idea what you’re missing. I don’t know if it’s the rocking from the waves or just the fact that you can look for miles and see nothing but blue; whatever it is, it’s relaxing.

You should try it sometime.”

“Maybe.”

“What about you? When you’re not working, what do you like to do?”

“I like to read, so I spend a lot of time at the library. I’ve always loved to cook and bake although the last apartment I lived in wasn’t really conducive to cooking. Since I moved… since I’ve been staying downstairs, I have been cooking a lot more. I love to try new recipes or make up ones on my own. There’s something very satisfying about making an entire meal from scratch.”

“I wouldn’t know. Unfortunately I can’t cook very much. A frozen pizza, spaghetti and anything that can be prepared in the microwave is pretty much the extent of my cooking skills.”

“I’m sure you could follow a recipe-”

“Nope. I can barely follow the instructions Julie leaves me on the food she freezes for the weekends when she is off. I get too distracted; I’ll start following a recipe or the heating instructions and then end up engulfed in emails or something work related. The next thing you know, whatever I was making is burned to a crisp.”

“I guess I could see how that could happen.”

We spend the next few hours learning more about each other as we lounge on the couch in the great room of Nicholas’s apartment. I find out he plays the guitar beautifully; I even talked him into playing a piece for me which was incredibly moving. I have absolutely no musical ability so watching someone play something so easily is amazing. I learn more about Nicholas’s family, although he doesn’t talk about the time in his life before he was adopted. I don’t ask about it because, not only is it really none of my business, but I want to respect his privacy in the way that he is respecting mine. At no point during our conversation does he ask any questions about my nightmare or even about my childhood. It dawns on me that he is likely purposely omitting those questions, knowing how I don’t like to talk about them.

“Nicholas?” I hear Vivienne’s voice from the foyer.

“Mom? What are you doing here?”

“I told Kenzie… Oh hi Kenzie! I wasn’t expecting you to still be here,” she quickly hugs me hello when she realizes I’m sitting on the couch.

“Are you still not feeling well Nicholas? Is your fever back? Is your stomach-”

“I’m fine Mom. Kenzie and I were just talking,” Nicholas quickly interrupts her.

“Oh good. I was hoping you didn’t start feeling bad again,” she sighs.

“I’m going to gather my stuff,” I quickly excuse myself, wanting to give them some privacy.

I make my way back to the guest room upstairs; the bed is still in complete disarray from last night. I quickly make the bed, not wanting to leave it a mess for Julie when she comes back tomorrow. I take a quick shower and stow the few belongings I brought with me on Friday when I packed in a hurry to stay the weekend. I straighten up the room, hoping to leave it as pristine as it was when I arrived on Friday-the last thing I want is to create more work for someone.

“Nicholas?” I walk into the great room expecting to see Vivienne and Nicholas still talking.

“In here,” his voice comes from his office.

“I was thinking I would get going-”

“Can you come in here for a moment?”

“Sure.”

“Have a seat.”

I sit in a chair across from a stunning mahogany desk that is covered with papers and files. I glance around the room, three of the walls have floor to ceiling bookshelves built into them with each shelf filled with books. The other wall has a long table against it filled with different office supplies including what appears to be a printer, shredder, scanner and a fax machine. I suppose he is truly set up to work completely from home like he said.

“This is for you,” he hands me a small white envelope. I open it, confused as to what it might be, and a wave of emotions come over me.

“What is this?” I look at the check in complete disbelief.

“Since we didn’t make arrangements for this weekend through Bridget I didn’t feel it was necessary to send the payment through her. If you would prefer that-”

“Payment?”

“For this weekend. I calculated your hourly rate by the number of hours you spent here this weekend. I added in a little extra since this was last minute and you had to miss your cooking classes-”

“I… I can’t accept this.”

“Why not?”NôvelD(ram)a.ôrg owns this content.

“Nicholas… this weekend… we weren’t… ”

I’m completely mortified that he would give me this check. I don’t understand why he suddenly reverted back to our business arrangement. Was it because I said I needed to leave? Was he always planning on paying me or did something happen to change his mind? I don’t think anything could have happened-

“You spent the weekend with me; why would you not accept this?”

“I… I didn’t do it because of our contract, Nicholas.”

“Then why did you do it? Why didn’t you tell Carter and my mother that you were busy? You had plans, Kenzie. You were supposed to attend that class-”

“You’re right I was. But I changed my plans. It wasn’t an issue. You needed someone here with you and I was able to rearrange things to be that person.”

“Which is why you should take this,” he hands me the check that I laid on his desk.

“No.”

“No?”

“No. I’m not taking this. We didn’t go through Bridget to arrange this, meaning this is outside our contract-”

“Which is why-”

“No. I refuse to accept this money, Nicholas. I didn’t do this because of a stupid contract.”

“Then why did you do this?”

“Because you needed someone!”

“But why you? You could have walked away. I don’t understand why you would do something like this and then not let me pay you!”

“Then I guess you don’t know me at all.”

“I know you need money, which was the reason you signed up with Bridget to begin with. You wanted to better your life. You wanted to go back to school and finish your degree. You wanted a safer place to live.

Take this money and use it for that, Kenzie. Please… you earned it this weekend.”

“I earned it?”

“Yes… you took care of me this weekend. You made sure I stayed hydrated, you gave me medicine round the clock, you stayed up half the night and you cooked for me.”

“And what about you?”

“What about me?”

“Should I pay you?”

“Pay me? For what? What would you pay me for?”

“For last night… should I pay you for the time you spent… comforting me?”

“What?!?! No, of course not! That was different!” “Why? Why was it different?”

“I… I don’t know it just was,” he answers quietly.

“I’m not taking this money, Nicholas. This weekend had nothing to do with our contract with Bridget and if you think that’s all this was…”

“Then why did you do it?”

“Good bye Nicholas.”