Chapter 69
Alena
I hadn't slept a wink last night even if I tried to.
My heart was heavy and my mind was crowded with different scenarios-I had imagined the ways I could try to run away but I knew it would risk Matteo's life as well. My phone was taken away from me. Therefore, I was left with nothing but own thoughts. my My bedroom was still the same as I had left a few years ago. It was never messy or filled with pink decorations because I had always loved a simple and minimalistic design. My room was simply white and beige with a few hints of colour such as black, if that was ever considered as a colour.
A cool colour. A moody colour.
A
I had sat
still on my bed, pulling the duvet near my body as I tried to ignore the throbbing headache. The first few hours felt. almost intoxicating but as the hours passed by, it was already morning and the headache had only gotten worse. I couldn't be bothered to figure out the time as I went to close the curtains, not wanting any seep of light to pass through. It was better to be in the dark and away from anyone because that made me feel at ease.
After being slapped by Papa last night, I had kept the mixed feelings to myself. He had never raised to hit me nor the rest of my siblings-we never knew any type of abuse within the family. I had never experienced it. My body was shaking as my stomach growled in hunger.
I laid still on the bed d as I I stared up at the ceiling, trying to ignore the dizziness. I had the urge to scream and hit my head against the wall but I knew it wasn't all worth it; my life wasn't over just because Papa wanted me to marry Viktor but I was back to square one, the same square I had left when I mart I married Matteo.
I
All of a sudden, I was bac I was back here.
here.
still had my career as a doctor and I was never going to lose that. I had spent years learning to earn my space in medicine, even Papa couldn't ruin that for me.
Any other parents were happy for their children if they ever wanted to pursue their studies in medicine but that wasn't in the odds for me. Maybe because we were a different family, my Papa killed people for a living and now my brother was taking over his place. When I was in university, nobody really knew what my parents did for a living. I only told them my family was in a really good business and even if they tried to pry, I kept my secret hidden as well as I could.
A low knock was heard on the door but I couldn't be bothered to sit up.
The door was pushed open as Mama stepped inside, slowly closing it behind her. She was carrying a tray of food and my stomach growled once more at the smell of delicious eggs and bacons; I felt like a teenager all over again.
"I brought you breakfast, sweetheart. Come and sit up," Mama said, placing the tray on the bed before helping me to sit up.
I did as told, wiping away the tears on my face.
I
I didn't have to look in the mirror to see if my eyes were swollen because I felt them. Even Mama's eyes were swollen from all the crying last night. Even after I had went to my bedroom last night, I could her the shoutings coming from my parent's
room.
Mama
and Papa were probably arguing.
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08:50
They rarely did scream or shout at each other but I guess, Mama had her limits too.
"They look and smell good." I muttered, slightly smiling.
They taste even better," she replied.
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Mama sat beside me before combing my hair with her fingers, running through them. It was a habit of hers to try and make me look presentable whenever she can but at this point, it was no use in doing so. I was just going to rot in bed for the next few days. Mama went ahead to feed me, making sure I was eating every bite.
My eyes went up to look at her and I hated the way she stared at me. The sympathy was too clear in them and I knew she felt sorry for me; she wanted to fix things if she could but just like myself, Mama didn't had much power.
Papa and Alexei had more power than they could hold.
"How do they taste like?" She asked, trying to pick up on small talk.
I nodded, "Delicious. Thank you Mama."
"Anything for you, honey. What do you want for lunch later?"
"You're spoiling me."
"You're my daughter. You deserve to be spoiled," she chuckled.
"I think I would still be full from this."
"Dinner then?" "I guess."
We both kept quiet for the next few minutes until I took my last bite and the plate was empty. My stomach felt full and I was finally feeling a bit better-I had starved when I was kidnapped, I remembered how much my body tried hard to survive. They only gave me a few drops of of water because they wanted to keep me alive.
Then again, I hadn't regained the weight I had lost.
It was going to take me some time.
Do you
think maybe we should run away somewhere?" I asked.
"Where would you want to go?"
You trav travel a lot, Mama. You know a lot of cool places we can go,"
"Mm, I enjoyed my time in
Korea."
"We would have a really good time there,"
"We would. Why do you ask, sweetheart?"
I shrugged, "It would be nice to run away together. Just the two of us but I know we wouldn't make it far. We might just end up at the airport with our passports blocked and stopped by the imigrations."
"That would be the sad truth, Alena." "How do
you
do it, Mama? How do you deal with him?" B
Mama looked away, sighing As her daughter, I had asked her a tough question but she knew her husband more than I knew father-she could easily answer them, even though she seemed like she was having a hard time figuring her own words. my I leaned back on the bed's headboard, looking at her.
"Your father was never a bad person, Alena. Whatever he did, he had good intentions and I'm not saying that because I love him or he's my husband but as a person who has lived with him for years. We went through a lot together," she replied. "I never assumed he was bad."
"I know what he did to you last night was unacceptable. You don't have to forgive him."
"And you do? For hurting me?"
She shook her head, "Not at all, sweetheart. That man like that and
ast night was not your father. Papa would never hurt you for whatever he did, just blame it all on him."
I blinked a f
I a few times, trying to prevent myself from crying. I seemed to be doing that a lot ever since I was taken away from Matteo, I had even wondered where the tears continued to come from because I swore I had cried them all.
My eyes were starting to sting as well.
"I muttered under my breath, looking down at my rings.
"He's ruining my life... mu
Matteo
had decided it was best to keep the truth away from me. I knew I was supposed to be angry at him but I couldn't even it that way towards him-he didn't want me to worry about Papa or Alexei, he just wanted me to be happy, he just wanted me to assume we were going to always be happy.
Our happiness was cut short. I wanted it to last,
"You deserve so much better, Alena." Mama said, caressing the side of my face.
"He wants me to marry Viktor, Mama. He's going to file a divorce for me," I spoke, hearing myself sobbing. My heart ached every time I thought about being forced to marry Viktor because I knew once I became his wife, he had every right on me I knew
I didn't marry Matteo for love but the love came by smoothly when we were together.
I couldn't easily love another after everything I went through with Matteo. He had taken my heart along with him and as long as we were separated, we were unhappy.
I
Mama pulled me in for a hug, rubbing my back.
"It's okay, sweetheart. I won't let that happen, I promise." She whispered in my ear, continuing to calm me down.
Mama's words sounded promising but I couldn't fully believe in it. I knew Mama had already loved Matteo as her son-in-law and she wanted what was best for me. Papa, on the other hand, only thought about building an alliance and gaining more power.
Sometimes, I had wished Papa wasn't my father.
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I know that's not true..."
"Alena,"
"You know it, Mama. You know you can't stop him."
She leaned back to look into my eyes as she sighed again, this time rubbing my arms. We could spend hours in this room and cried our hearts out, the men in our family never cared.
She
I knew Papa was different before. Maybe, he didn't know who else to blame.
"But I won't let that happen to you. I won't let you marry Viktor," she said.
"Do you think you can stop him? He might hurt you next,"
"Alena... don't say it like that."
"It's true. He hit me in front of you."
"I know. I saw it."
"Don't defend him, Mama. Don't keep putting up excuses for him just because you love him. People change all the time and maybe, we just have to accept the fact that he might be changing, too." I replied, holding onto her hand as she nodded. "We will stop him. Whatever it takes."